It was the strangest thing…

At the Sassy Mastermind Retreat in San Diego recently, I was featured in a success panel, had my “Possibility Portraits” displayed to acclaim, was privately thanked for my contributions, reconnected with loving friends, AND had our mentor, Lisa Sasevich, generously promote me (I’m painting her family’s Possibility Portrait).

You’d think I’d be on top of the world!
But you’d be dead wrong.

Sassy Mastermind group (I’m in red hat & dress)

There I was, blessed with public recognition, peer appreciation, and love — and yet I couldn’t take in any of it, because I felt so completely unworthy. Inside I kept thinking, “Ha!  You wouldn’t say that if you knew what I’m really like…”

The truth is I’d been feeling stuck for weeks, resisting changes I was experiencing in my business and feeling anxious and unsure about what direction to go next. All the praise at the Retreat only heightened my embarrassment that I, a supposed visioning expert, just couldn’t see my way forward!  My confidence was completely shaken.

Fortunately I’ve learned enough to know that when we feel stuck, it’s vital to reach out for support from people who will remind us of our true power. So I stopped trying to hide my distress, and started telling the tear-stained truth about what I was going through.  (I’m blessed to have many people in my life who can be counted on to remind me of my power when I’m down, just as I do for them and my clients.)

What amazing support I received!  Like the simple reminder that I am in the midst of a process of deep inquiry, and can trust that I will be guided through it — IF I open myself up to guidance. (Oh yeah, I’d been forgetting to journal, meditate, pray, examine dreams, and track synchronicities… to actually ASK for guidance from Source!)

And recalling the power of making requests and asking for support.  If I hadn’t asked, I couldn’t have received the profoundly healing belief-change session led by my friend, colleague, and fellow Sassy, Nikkea Devida (she’s next to me in the photo above, in the blue jacket). Because I asked, Nikkea guided 4 of us women through a beautiful process that left me feeling clearer and more peaceful than I had in ages. I love Nikkea’s powerful, scientifically-based belief change work, and in fact am learning how to do it myself; you’re invited to listen in when I interview her on Sept. 21. Click here for details and to get call-in info.

And remembering that the only way out of changes that scare us is through them.  When we stop running away — and instead dive in with a spirit of curiosity:  “what can I learn here?” — we open ourselves up to insight, new possibilities for action, and even a sense of play and wonder.

It helps to have coach for this process, to uncover the truth about repressed issues that we think are “fine,” but are in fact  creating tension, anxiety, suffering, and/or resistance (often expressed as tiredness, confusion and procrastination). All that icky stuff is part of our Shadow, what we avoid and fear about ourselves and our challenges… yet when we actually stop and examine our Shadow, it always has gifts for us.

One last lesson I re-remembered: the surest way out of feeling stuck is to take imperfect action — do something bold, even if you aren’t sure about it, even though you’re not ready. Writing this article is an example of that: I wanted to wait until I had some breakthroughs to report. But that could take a while… ;p and I’m tired of pretending I have it all together, and ready to share what I’m learning just from being in the process of exploring change — with no idea where it will lead.  (Getting comfortable with the unknown is perhaps the greatest gift I’ve received; not easy for someone like me who always wants to know the answers!) So stay tuned.

All this telling the truth, asking for guidance, examining our Shadow, and taking imperfect action isn’t comfortable or easy, but it is necessary preparation for a new level of growth and clarity. We have to till the soil to get it ready for planting new seeds…  I’ll be sharing this process in detail (and answering your questions, and learning from your stories) in my free call, How to Get Unstuck: 3 Surprising Ways to Shift, Recharge, and Flow with Change on Sept. 29. Click here to join us.

Speaking of change — my colleague and friend, Hilary Barrett, has organized a wonderful “Festival of Change” at the beginning of September. There are 6 very interesting speakers (including me, yay! See more here) and the whole theme has just set me thinking…

Change is inevitable. Life is Change.

So let’s work with it, embrace it, discard the beliefs that hold us back, and move forward with confidence and clarity!

I know my journey is meant to be shared with others. In fact, this is what makes all ups and downs worth it — so when I break through to new levels, you can too!  Please tell me if this article sparks thoughts about your own journey; I’m glad we’re on this path together.

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